Hi Natie,
Very good start! Moved along well and maitained that feeling of something potentially very dark lurking in the next chapter! There were a couple of tortured and clunky sections where the grammar and the meaning wrestled for supremacy – and neither won! Other than that a 4 out of 5!
Best,
Uncle Steve
sue
October 22, 2009 at 9:48 am
Hey Nate
A very good start if not a tad depressing but where is the rest??? Did leave me wanting to read more !
adelle&christian
November 8, 2009 at 10:04 pm
Well Nathaniel I’m glad we had more to read then usual. We both found it interesting and are looking forward to the next installment. Keep it up
SoRoL
November 29, 2009 at 5:00 pm
Hi Natie,
Very good start! Moved along well and maitained that feeling of something potentially very dark lurking in the next chapter! There were a couple of tortured and clunky sections where the grammar and the meaning wrestled for supremacy – and neither won! Other than that a 4 out of 5!
Best,
Uncle Steve